Every day we are bombarded with upsetting and frightening news – whether it’s devastating wildfires, plane crashes, wars, mass shootings, acts of cruelty or seeming madness. Self-compassion provides a refuge from the storm as we try to navigate stressful and uncertain times.
Some people think that self-compassion means just accepting the pain of our situation without trying to change things. When we care about ourselves, we will advocate for change, and our voice becomes more powerful and authentic.
Most of us work hard at home or at our profession, but how many of us stop to ask ourselves what makes us truly happy? One of the most consistent findings of the research literature is that self-compassion leads to greater life satisfaction and contentment. It does so in part
One of the biggest blocks to practicing self-compassion is the belief that it will undermine our motivation. People think that if they’re kind to themselves, they’ll become lazy, irresponsible, and complacent. The opposite is true.Tender self-compassion allows us to accept ourselves unconditionally, while fierce self-compassion spurs us to take action
The current news portrays a world that is out-of-balance, verging on out-of-control. How can we maintain equilibrium when faced with such disarray? By tapping into “caring force” – a healthy balance between fierce and tender self-compassion – we can find more stable footing as we meet the challenges in our
A huge part of caring for ourselves means guarding ourselves from harm. This doesn’t mean we shut down our hearts, quite the opposite. It means that we open our hearts. But we also open our eyes to the potential of being drained of our time or energy in a way
Do you find yourself saying yes to requests automatically, even when you don’t want to? Do you worry excessively about hurting others feelings or being disliked if you say no? Many of us have trouble drawing clear boundaries, especially if we assume that being “nice” means being accommodating.
Tender self-compassion is the gentle, nurturing side of caring that provides comfort and self-acceptance when we struggle. Fierce self-compassion is the powerful, action-oriented side of caring that provides strength, motivation and self-protection. Problems emerge when they get out of balance: Tenderness without fierceness can lead to complacency, and fierceness without
Fierce self-compassion can propel us to stand up for and protect ourselves, meet our own needs without continually subordinating them, and motivate change both in ourselves and the world around us. Like yin and yang, tender and fierce self-compassion must be balanced and integrated for wholeness and wellbeing.
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